Contemplation.

I went and saw my psychiatrist today. One of his associates thinks that I need to be hospitalized.

I don't want to go, but everyone thinks I should. I really hate it there, but if I need to go I need to go. I'm spending the next couple of days making my decision. I want to go see my new therapist on Friday and ask her what she thinks about it, but people think I shouldn't wait that long.

After last year, I don't know, I just don't know.
Another schizophrenic relapse is breathing on the back of my neck. I would have to leave school, and who knows how long I'd be in the hospital. I could do day program and I wonder if they would allow me to not come on Tuesdays because I have school. Maybe I'll give them a call.

I just took the meds to start my period. Lets hope this works. I'm scared and worried.

My doctor is having me do some blood work and an ultrasound looking for ovarian cysts. Wouldn't having cysts hurt? I haven't had any pain.

I do hope though something gets revealed. My mom thinks I should just get my tubes tied and be done with it. Its been nothing but trouble.

Anyway,

I hope I get results soon so I can stop stressing out.