Graduating.

I registered for my last semester at OCC.  I'll be taking Cosmology, Intro to Shakespeare, and Calculus I.  It's my last semester before I transfer to MSU for my bachelor degree in astrophysics.  I also just scheduled my appointment with counseling to graduate.  It'll be the first time I've ever graduated anything.

I didn't graduate high school because I didn't value the education at the time.  I got bored, restless.  I felt that school wasn't worth my time.  I didn't do any of the homework and I would have had to attend another year in order to graduate.  I said no to that and decided to just get my GED.

I've attempted school several times, but never seriously.  This time I am serious, however.  I take learning very seriously.  I value all the information I'm exposed to, and I want to soak it up like a sponge.  I am doing just that now.

I'm proud of myself.  I get straight A's (except for an A- or two) and I understand all the information in my classes.  I worked hard to get here, but I know it's not even half as hard as the work I'm going to have to do in the future.  I'm excited to work harder for classes.

I'm going to have a giant party to celebrate my graduation.  I want to plan it way in advance so that as many people can come as possible.  I want this to be a major celebration.

Life is complex, and life is hard, especially for someone with schizophrenia.  It is hard to be successful in anything.  I am successful in school, so far.  I never thought I'd actually be able to do it.  I thought I'd end up messing up somewhere, making some mistake, that would sabotage everything.  But I haven't, not once.  Unless you count the A-'s, I am as successful as you can be.  

It's not easy attending school while you're actively hallucinating, or delusional, or paranoid.  It takes a lot of work to set that all aside and make school it's own world.  It has to be separated from the rest of life, put up on a pedestal.  You have to create your own dimension for it, something not affected by your own mental laws.  In order to succeed, everything going on in your head has to simply be ignored. 

Calculus I and Cosmology are both at the Orchard Ridge campus.  I take Calculus from 1200 to 1400, and Cosmology from 1500 to 1700.  Intro to Shakespeare is an online course.  I have to take the 0940 bus because the 1050 bus gets there at 1147, and if the bus is late, then I'll be late - and I can't risk that.  So I'm going to get there early, at 1040.  That means I have to wake up early, but that's alright.  I also wonder if I'll be allowed to hang out with the winter's astronomy class.  I know I'm welcome to anything at Orchard Ridge (if it goes through my professor, of course) so I'm sure I'll be welcome to join.

That's about it, I suppose.  Until next time.